people who bite ice cream with their front teeth are on a whole different level
"omg why are you crying?" "the economy, bro"
I hate when people mention someone in their life by their name without providing me with any context about who this person is.
“So Dylan and I went to yoga class yesterday — ”
Hold it right there. Who the fuck is Dylan. Your boyfriend? Your arch nemesis? Your brother? Your pet sea monkey? Your therapist? Your favourite fictional character? Are you on a first-name basis with your dad? Last-name basis with Bob? WHO THE FUCK IS DYLAN.
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.
till you will see me again and live in me.
Till then my windows ache.